It could be that your child has a sensory motor integration deficit known as tactile defensiveness or touch sensitivity.
The sense of touch is essential for normal social and emotional development. It is this system that allows us to make the deepest connections with others. It is through touch that the mother and child bond to each other. This is how we connect most closely with our spouses.
Touch also serves a protective function. It is through tactile discomfort or pain that we realize that things like fire are dangerous. Painful or unpleasant touch experiences tell us to prepare for a physical threat that might require a need to run away or retaliate.
In some people this tactile sensory system is not functioning properly. These people experience pain or distress from touch sensations that other people find non-threatening or even pleasant. These people have sensory integration disorder known as tactile defensiveness or touch sensitivity.
Children with touch sensitivity are often in the state of "red alert". Many of the sensations that we take as meaningless, they view as a physical threat. Children with touch sensitivity also experience tactile sensations differently than others. Something that we experience as smooth can seem to them painful. The result is that often their behavior is affected. Casual contact can cause what others view as extreme and inappropriate reactions. These children may whine cling lash out or run away as a result of normal things in their environment.
Sensory motor integration deficits need not affect a child's learning ability, but his resulting reaction often does. Because the child is frequently on the defense, he can be emotionally insecure and extremely distractible. This is one of the things that differentiate touch sensitivity from ADHD. ADHD children have difficulty sustaining attention, but they are not more easily distracted than other children. Small stimuli that would not affect an ADHD child who is engaged in an activity, may cause disturb a touch sensitive child.
To give you an idea of how these children experience the world, imagine the feeling you have when someone scrapes his nails along a blackboard, or the feeling you have when you cut your nails too short. This is how a touch sensitive child might experience a warm caress. There is a difference, however. When you cut your nails too short, it bothers you for a while, but the discomfort goes away. If a child is touch sensitive, the discomfort never goes away.
The child may not be able to wear his dress pants because the feel of wool is too uncomfortable to bear. He may not be able to concentrate in school because he is enduring the hardness of the chair or the rush of air blowing on him from the ventilation system. He may be quick to lash out when another child bumps him, because of the perceived attack by the other child. He may be unable to make friends because of the fear of being bumped prevents him from interacting in a normal fashion.
Adults with a sensory integration disorder may have problems in their relationships with their spouses. Normal daily contact may disturb them, and they may avoid physical contact with their spouses even when such contact is appropriate. This desire not to be touched can have a seriously negative impact on a marriage.
Here are some of the things that may indicate that your child is touch sensitive. Your child may be touch sensitive if he:
In adults and children with sensory motor integration deficits the palms of the hands, soles of feet, mouth and tongue are usually most sensitive areas.
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