A professional assessment is necessary to determine whether or not a child has an Attachment disorder. At the Center we use several tests as part of a comprehensive assessment to determine what attachment issues are causing problems and what will be the most effective treatment plan. We work very closely with the parents to develop a plan to help remediate attachment problems. This check list can help you identify areas of potential problem. This check list is not meant to substitute for a professional assessment and treatment plan.

Circle the items if they are frequently or often true.

1. My child teases, hurts, or is cruel to other children.
2. My child can't keep friends for an age-appropriate length of time.
3. My child doesn't do as well in school as my child could do even with a little more effort.
4. My child pushes me away or becomes stiff when I try to hug, unless my child wants something from me, in which case my child can be affectionate and engaging.
5. My child argues for long periods of time, often about meaningless or silly things.
6. My child has a large need to control everything.
7. My child is hyper-vigilant.
8. My child acts amazingly innocent, or pretends that things aren't really bad or a problem when caught doing something wrong.
9. My child does dangerous things such as runs away, jumps out of windows, or other potentially harmful actions. My child seems oblivious to the fact that my child may be hurt.
10. My child deliberately breaks or ruins his things or other's things.
11. My child doesn't seem to feel age-appropriate guilt when my child does something wrong.
12. My child is impulsive. My child seems unable or unwilling to stop doing something my child wants to do.
13. My child teases, hurts, or is cruel to animals.
14. My child steals, or shows up with things that belong to others with unbelievable, unusual, or suspicious reasons for how my child got these things.
15. My child likes to sneak things without permission, even though my child could have had these things if my child had asked.
16. My child doesn't seem to learn from mistakes, consequences, or punishments (my child continues the behavior despite the consequences).
17. My child makes false reports of abuse or neglect. My child tries to get sympathy from others, or tries to get us in trouble, by telling others that I abuse, don't feed, or don't provide the basic necessities.
18. My child seems not to experience pain when hurt, refusing to let anyone provide comfort.
19. My child does not usually ask for things. My child demands things.
20. My child lies, often about obvious or ridiculous things, or when it would have been easier to tell the truth.
21. My child is quite bossy with other children and adults.
22. My child hoards, sneaks food, or has other unusual eating habits (eats paper, raw sugar, non-food items, package mixes, baker's chocolate, etc.)
23. My child often does not make eye contact when adults want to make eye contract with my child.
24. My child has extended temper tantrums.
25. My child chatters non-stop, asks repeated questions about things that make no sense, mutters, or is hard to understand when talking.
26. My child is accident-prone (gets hurt a lot), or complains a lot about every little ache and pain (needs constant attention).
27. My child acts cute or charming to get others to do what my child wants.
28. My child is overly friendly with strangers.
29. My child has set fires, or is preoccupied with fire.
30. My child prefers to watch violent cartoons and/or TV shows or horror movie (regardless of whether or not you allow your child to do this).
31. My child was abused/neglected during the first year of life, or had several changes of primary caretaker during the first several years of life.
32. My child was in an orphanage for more than the first year of life.
33. My child was adopted after the age of twelve months.

If you find that more than a few items (more than five or so) have been circled, your child may be experiencing difficulties that require professional assistance. If, in addition to several items being marked, any of the last three items is check, your child may be experiencing attachment related problems.

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AWeidman

 

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Interesting

I find that this may explain a little bit about how I act. I've always thought that some of my behaviors were caused by my ADD, but I guess not. i'm not very open with my emotions, especially when there's something wrong. When I think about that...I can't help but think, "Wow, I'm even more screwed up than I ever thought I was. My life's a serious mess." Well, I'll manage somehow...I think...I dunno.

Alex J. Potterton , May 11, 2009

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Fascinating

This has described me in many ways when I was younger but to my knowledge I was never adopted which the majority of children with attachment disorder have been. I wonder if it is possible to get attachment disorder without having been adopted or if I was adopted and no one told me.

Crystal Foster , December 09, 2009

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... , Low-rated comment [Show]

miss

hey nick- these are not all normal develomental behaviors-my son is adopted and had a severly traumatic infancy---i have to disagree with you and your very negative attitude! im happy that you have 2 healthy little boys---i do not! any help or positive reassurance is very necessary to help me through my days--every single day! im not sure why exactly you were even on this site if your boys are showing no signs of attachment issues--for those of us parents that have attachment issues with our children--stay strong and supportive! never stop fighting for your children!

cole , February 04, 2010

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...

my 5 years old girl seems to have most of the list. but i raise her myself as i am a housewife. Till now, she still being a very complicated child to understand. i dont know what to do as i alway love her and care for her very much.

suriani , February 18, 2010

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Not typical

I have an adopted sister, 15 y/o (adopted at one day old) that exhibits erratic behavior. It may seem to be generalized but if you truly know a child with an attachment disorder there is no denying her actions and her unpredictability or carelessness. I am a psych student (31 y/o) and I am not one to label but after many years of watching her strange, peculiar behavior I am convinced of RAD.

Sorry Nick but I disagree. Maybe at 3 y/o it is normal for your child who is still developing to present many of these signs but it IS NOT NORMAL for a more developed adolescent to do so.

Jenna G , April 09, 2010

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Nick, As the parent of two girls, one born to me, and the other adopted at age three, I can tell you the symptoms of attachment problems are not in the parents' imaginations. I have also worked in education for 10+ years, and I am very experienced with what is normal behavior. RAD kids exhibit some very specific and frustrating behaviors that very often have nothing to do with how they are currently being parented, and are often highly skilled at manipulation (far beyond the norm). This isn't a criticism of the children, it is merely a reality driven by their history of trying to get their needs met.
Really, you may want to rethink your judgment of parents with these children; usually they are not the biological parents, they are simply the ones trying desperately to overcome the results of the child's past abuse or neglect.

Christine V. , April 19, 2010

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Difficult

In regards to Nick. You really don't know what you are talking about. We have an adopted daughter, who for years has had massive behaviour problems and on becoming a teenager, has become more unmanageable. She has recently been diagnosed with RAD and is on meds which is helping quite a bit. All her anger is targeted at me.She is hard work as she gets into a rage over the slightest thing. Takes her ages to calm down, by that time, I am a nervous wreck. We love her and I hope in time, things will get better.

Leanne , May 08, 2010

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Nick, Can I have your drugs??

I am addressing this letter to Nick, but actually I address it to all the neighsayers (including my mother-in-law)who have no idea what living with a RAD kid is all about. Nick, you are an idiot. Sorry but that is a fact. You know not of which you speak. Your boys are healthy (Thank God). I am so glad for you that they are. My daughter, unfortunately is not. I can not even tell you why. Her bio-mom is a drug addict and was too worried about her next high to worry about where her daughter was, how she was cared for, or if she was cared for. At 4 y/o my daughter had to be the sole support/parent for her three younger siblings. Bath time, Feeding, Diapers, the whole nine yards (SHE WAS 4!!!!) We took custody of her when she was 4 and a half (over the 3 year developmental mark) she has serious problems with who is the "Parent" and who is the "Child". She does not think anyone can take care of her. She goes into fits of SEVERE rage when she is not in control. Nick, have you ever been threatened with a knife by an 8 year old!!??!! Go ahead, laugh. I know most people don't think I am serious, but guess what? I am DEADLY SERIOUS!!! This is the life I live. This is my DAILY EXISTENCE!!!! So basically, I dare Nick to tell me that I am crazy. Am I a horrible parent? Do I have a problem that you can explain?? Tell me, I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR IT!!!!!!! Guess what, I have heard it before and you are full of sh$#. This is my daughter, my problem and I am working DILIGENTLY to find a solution. If you want to piss on my parade then find another street, cause I WILL NOT GO INTO THE GREAT GOOD NIGHT. I will fight for my daughter and I will make sure she has the best care possible to correct what has happened to her in her past!!!.

Signed
A LOVING "Mom"

Robyn Canning , July 22, 2010

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...

I have lived with RAD for the past three years and my husband even longer than that. His ex wife neglected their son for the first two years of his life, locked the child in his room for whole days while Dad was working. Nick you have no idea what something like that does to a child. The ex is no longer permitted to contact my stepson but we live every day with a child who is 15 years old and exhibits 27 of the characteristics on the list. We can't leave him unsupervised, have to lock up our valuables and stay in constant often daily contact with his school as he steals things rather than just asking for them. Not once, not twice, but over and over and over, the acts surprisd by the consequences he receives. Attachment disorder is very very real and very hard on the whole family. We have three other kids and dealing with our 15 year old often takes our attention away from the others. So Nick if your three year old is exhibiting symptoms on the list, be glad he is acting in an age approrpiate manner, My 15 year old often acts like he is three.

Sunny , August 21, 2010

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